Dan Amira reads the New York Times profile of Politico's force of nature and sifts the evidence:
[Allen] shares few qualities with the human race but many with homeless people and robots. Please bear with us as we review the evidence:
A hyperactive former Eagle Scout, Allen will have been up for hours [by 4:20 a.m.], if he ever went to bed. Whether or not he did is one of the many little mysteries that surround him ....
Okay, so Allen gets very little, if any, sleep.
A corollary are “Mikey Sightings,” a bipartisan e-mail chain among prominent people who track Allen’s stutter-stepping whereabouts — his showing up out of nowhere, around corners, at odd hours, sometimes a few time zones away ...
He possesses the ability to teleport. So far, we're looking at some kind of futuristic robot.
Allen — who is childless and owns no cars or real estate — perpetually picks up meal and beverage tabs for his friend-sources (the dominant hybrid around Mikey). He kisses women’s hands and thanks you so much for coming, even though the party is never at his home, which not even his closest friends have seen ...
Nobody has seen his house? A few points for hobo.
Allen also has a tendency to suddenly vanish. But then he will pop up on a TV screen a few minutes later....
Robot!
People routinely wonder whether Allen actually lives somewhere besides the briefing rooms, newsrooms, campaign hotels or going-away dinners for Senator So-and-So’s press secretary that seem to be his perpetual regimen.
Hobo!
The analysis of evidence and counter-evidence, and the frightening conclusion, continues here.